Tag Archives: writing-tips

Overcoming Writing Excuses: Start Your Book Today

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You have an idea for a novel/nonfiction book/stage play/screenplay/book of poetry/book of essays/etc. but you haven’t been able to actually do anything with it.

It sits there. An idea. Going nowhere.

If you don’t activate it soon, you’ll lose interest in it and enthusiasm about it.

You may have any number of excuses for not moving forward and developing your idea. Some of the most common excuses are:

  1. I don’t have time to write.
  2. I don’t know how to write or, I don’t know how to do this kind of writing.
  3. I’m not good with spelling and grammar.
  4. Other people whose works I’ve read are really good writers. Where do I get the nerve to even think that I can write in their space?
  5. This will take me such a long time. Is it even worth it to start?
  6. What if I finish it and it doesn’t get published?
  7. What if it turns out to be awful? I’d be so embarrassed.
  8. What if it gets published or I self-publish it and no one reads it?

Most of these excuses are bullshit, and badass writers don’t indulge in bullshit. Acknowledge them for what they really are: AN EXPRESSION OF FEAR.

  1. I don’t have time to write. There are ways to squeeze writing time into the busiest schedule. I’ll recommend some in another post. But this is probably about you being afraid. If you write TEN MINUTES A DAY, you’ll put it more than an hour a week. You can accomplish a lot in an hour.
  2. I don’t know how to write or, I don’t know how to do this kind of writing. You learn. You learn by doing and by reading about writing. There are MANY resources available to you (including some I offer).
  3. I’m not good with spelling and grammar. Then you write what you want to write and either hire an editor/proofreader or get that smart English major friend of yours to correct your masterpiece for a few beers.
  4. I’ve read books like the one I want to write by really good writers. Where do I get the nerve to even think that I can write in their space? These writers inspired you to write! And keep in mind the fact that they didn’t start out being really good writers. They probably started out feeling just as doubtful about their ability as you do now – BUT THEY DID START.
  5. This will take me such a long time. Is it even worth it to start? That’s something you need to decide. However, wasting time thinking this way will not get you to the finish line any faster.
  6. What if I finish it and it doesn’t get accepted by a publisher? Then you self-publish it. (SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION ALERT: See my course, How to Self-Publish Your Badass Book on Amazon. It’s on Teachable.com.)
  7. What if I self-publish it and no one reads it? You will have to promote the hell out of it. I cover how to do that in the above-mentioned course.
  8. What if it turns out to be awful? I’d be so embarrassed. There is no limit on the number of times you can revise it. You can continue to improve that. You can hire a co-writer or an editor to help you improve it.

There. There is no excuse for the excuses you’re using to excuse yourself from writing what you want to write.

Get to it.

Keeping Track of Submissions

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The why is easy. You want to keep a record of the people, companies, theatres etc. that you have sent your work to – or sent a query letter to – so that you don’t:
• Duplicate submissions (which will waste your time and piss the submittees* off)
• Miss submitting to someone you should submit to (which may prevent you from getting published or produced)

I recommend using an Excel worksheet. It’s easy to use and does everything you need it to do. If you have another program that you prefer, use it. There is no one way to do this.

What should your spreadsheet include?

• The name of your work – this can either be a column, or you can have an entire tab devoted to one work.
• The name and title of the person or company or organization you’re submitting to.
• The name of the publishing company, theatre company, publication or whatever organization it is that you are sending to.
• What you’re sending. Is it a query letter? The first ten pages or three chapters? A synopsis? What goes in this column will depend upon what the submittee says he or she wants you to send. You can find this information on the company’s website. Do not ignore it. If a literary agent wants a synopsis and the first five pages, do NOT send the entire novel or nonfiction book because it is so brilliant, so well-written THAT YOU ARE CERTAIN the agent will want to read the entire thing, not just five pages. If the agent likes those pages, he or she will ask to see the entire manuscript. Disregarding instructions is a BIG red flag; you are letting the agent know that you will be difficult to work with. Likewise, if a publisher says they don’t accept unagented work and you don’t have an agent, don’t send to them out of an overabundance of confidence. It will be a wasted effort.

You may NEVER get a response

Sadly, many cells in this column will stay blank. You often won’t hear back from agents or publishers – even those who say they are open to submissions. Accept that fact right now, so you won’t pine away for an acknowledgement that you exist. That you write. Some agents will answer you, but that will almost always take a looooooong time. Agents get a lot of submissions. Don’t think about that. It will only depress and discourage you. If you are determined to be a writer, write and submit. Rinse and repeat. Screw the competition.

If you actually DO get a response-

Keep notes about them. I might write something like: “nice rejection email – it’s in agent folder.” That tells me to check that email I saved the next time I submit a (different) work to that agent. I might use the comments in their email, to remind them that they liked my writing the last time. “I appreciated the positive feedback and constructive criticism you gave me on my novel, ‘Palm Tree Pipe Dreams.’” With that, I am reminding the agent that even though they did not decide to represent me, there was something about my writing that they liked. If an agent absolutely HATED my work (and they will rarely admit to that), I jot that down, too, so that I don’t waste time sending to them in the future.

Other things to keep track of

Make note of things you learn that will save you time and effort going forward. Things like:
• Ms. QPOEIREWPOIU is no longer with this agency.
• This agency is no longer in business.
• This agency says it no longer accepts submissions.
Like that. Information that will help you going forward.
A lot of the above is relevant for fiction, nonfiction, short stories, plays and other creative endeavors. You can also keep a spreadsheet when applying for paid writing assignments or for full- or part-time writing jobs.

Why You Should NOT Pitch Your Work as Unique

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This is going to be a hard truth to swallow, so brace yourself. Even though you’ve written something you’re convinced is a one-of-a-kind piece – and it may well be – that’s not the way you want to sell it to literary agents and publishers.

The literary industry is, first and foremost, an industry. It exists to make money. Sure, it does so by managing the work of authors, which is pretty great. But it is, essentially, a profit machine.

Profit machines are not designed to take risks. On one level, agents and publishers are looking for the next fresh voice. They love books! They love reading and they love authors and they are always on the hunt for writing that speaks to them in some new way.

However, they must be reassured that there is some precedent for whatever it is you’re submitting to them – especially a precedent that sold well.

Name Dropping is Not Only OK…

When composing your query letter, you’ll make a stronger case for yourself if you place your book into a recognizable context. For example: “My thriller, Miles to Go Before I Die, explores territory familiar to readers of David Baldacci and Harlan Coben, but with a surprising main character: a flight attendant with a gambling addiction who finds herself thrown into a world of global intrigue.”

Damn. That sounds good. Maybe I should write that book! But note what I did in that description. I invoked the names of two best-selling authors, thereby associating myself with them and hinting that my writing is as good as theirs. Hinting. Then I drop a twist into it, by telling them about my main character. A flight attendant with a gambling addiction? If nothing else, it should make them curious.

The book does not have to be just like those written by Baldacci and Coben. The phrase “explores territory familiar to” is sufficiently vague.

What I’ve done here is to let the agent or publisher know that there is an existing readership for my book. Baldacci, Coben and other successful authors of thrillers have laid the groundwork for it and built up a community of readers who love thrillers. In other words, I am telling the publishing industry that my book is likely to make money. Is that guaranteed? Of course not – but the people I’m querying already know that. What they want to know is that profit is likely.

(Note: I’ve used a fiction example here, but this strategy can be used with nonfiction as well.)

Send a Signal

In the example above, I’m also demonstrating that I have some understanding of how the publishing industry works. I am sending a signal that the agent or publisher will not be dealing with some amateur who is trying to sell them a poorly written book.

The point of a query is to get agents and/or publishers interested enough to request your manuscript. They cannot afford to waste time and energy on a book that will probably not appeal to readers. Even if what you’ve written is unique, dropping names and mentioning genres will place your book in a recognizable – and intriguing context. It will increase your chances of having your manuscript read by decision-makers in the publishing industry.

Don’t Put a Bad Title on a Good Book

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The title you bestow upon your book will determine whether or not a potential reader…reads past it. An uninteresting, poorly composes title will keep the reader – otherwise known as a buyer – moving right along, to other, better titled books.

Your title must give some indication about what the books is about, but it has to do much more than that. It has to be intriguing. It has to pique curiosity. It has to be like a siren song that draws the right readers to what you’ve written.

What do I mean by “right readers”?

Some writers delude themselves into thinking that literally everyone will be enthralled by what they’ve written. That is never the case. Readers have specific preferences. Someone who has bookshelves full of nonfiction tomes about military history and owns not one single book about vampire erotica (yes, that actually is a category) will not be interested in your book about vampire erotica. Don’t waste time on trying to lure that person in by trying to craft a title they’ll like.

Whatever it is you’ve written, whether it’s nonfiction or fiction, stage plays or poems, essays or graphic novels, there are readers for it. Your title has got to alert them to your work’s existence. Make them excited about it.

Start by studying the titles of other books in your category, especially the ones that are selling well. Are there words or phrases that are used in book after book? Pay attention to that. Book buyers use keywords and phrases when looking for something new to read. You will want to put your own spin on how keywords are used, of course, but keep the popular ones in mind as you compose your title.

As I mentioned earlier, your title should be intriguing in some way. I’ve written a number of stage plays. I decided to pull monologues from them and publish them as a separate book, entitled, Monologues for Actors (that directors aren’t sick of hearing). The title starts out fairly straightforward, then veers into more unexpected territory. Actors who are looking for monologues to use during auditions will get it. Using monologues that are not overly used may cause directors to pay more attention to them.

Some examples

The Rosebud Burglar: a Victorian Romance starts with two words that don’t seem to go together – to provoke curiosity – and follows them up with a description that makes the genre clear (a Victorian Romance). A nonfiction book I wrote has a title that includes a negative stereotype: The New Old Maid: Satisfied Single Woman. But wait! The word “New” signals that something is different about this book. Then “Satisfied Single Women” adds to that perception: something really is different. (And it is! I interviewed never-married women from all over the U.S. and all walks of life and found that they are leading happy, fulfilled lives.)

There’s no shame in click bait

So make your title so interesting that readers/buyers keep reading, and get to the brilliant description of synopsis you’ve written for your book. Make your title shameless click bait. Also- keep it fairly short. Customers are more likely to skim right past titles that are more than 60 characters in length.

Finish the Damn Thing!

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It took me ten years to finish my first novel*. Ten freakin’ years. This was no Walt Whitman “Leaves of Grass” kind of thing, where I spent the time writing and rewriting, perfecting and fine-tuning and ended up with a masterpiece. No. There were false starts, long breaks and considerable time spent wallowing in self-doubt. Also, I had some fairly impressive excuses:

  • I moved several times during the novel writing process
  • I changed jobs
  • I lost two close family members
  • And did I mention how I spent time wallowing in self-doubt?

The first three items on the list may seem like legitimate excuses. The fourth – not so much.

It is almost miraculous that after several years-long breaks in the writing action, I was able to revive my initial enthusiasm for my story, go forward with it and finish it. Why? Because an estimated 97 percent of people who begin a novel never finish it. I didn’t just pull this figure out of my ass. I got it from a number of other bloggers, who pulled it out of their asses. Whatever the actual number, it’s a safe bet that many would-be writers of fiction, nonfiction, stage plays and other long-form works never complete their projects.

Are you one of them?

Writing like a badass means finishing your projects: taking a proverbial machete and hacking your way through the jungle of self-doubt in which we all find ourselves from time to time. YOU HAVE AN IDEA. Many people never have an idea, so that alone makes you special. Don’t let it die on the vine. In the jungle.

Enough with the metaphors.

Writing something long is a daunting task. I get it. And there is no guarantee that if you finish it, it will end up a best-seller or a National Book Award winner. So why put yourself through it? Because YOU HAVE AN IDEA. Suppress it or ignore it at your own peril. Regret is painful.

Here are three actionables to help you complete a big, daunting writing project:

  1. Work on it every day. No kidding. Short on time, because you work, work out, drive the kids to soccer practice, blah blah blah? Set an alarm for ten minutes and write for ten minutes a day. Do it at the same time every day, so that the habit gets cemented into your schedule. Eventually, what is likely to happen is that the alarm goes off and you keep writing, because you’ve finally regained your enthusiasm.
  2. Divide your project into small, bite-size pieces. If you’re working on a novel and haven’t created an outline, doing so will help you see it in manageable sections. Outlines are absolutely essential for many kinds of non-fiction books (and yours will come in handy when you are submitting to agents).
  3. Speaking of small, write a short version or section of your very long project. This lets you back into it and helps you avoid that unpleasant feeling of intimidation. It can also be useful in drilling down into details, character backgrounds, plot twists that hadn’t occurred to you. A small version of a very long project can take the form of
    ~a short story based on your novel
    ~an article based on your nonfiction book
    ~ten-minute play based on your full-length play

The most important of these actionables (if you want to write like a badass) is #1. Write every day, even if what you’re turning out is garbage. Sooner or later, it will stop being garbage and start being what you want it to be. Writing every day will also reinforce your identity. If you don’t believe you are a writer, you won’t write.

Not like a badass, anyway.

Now go finish the damn thing.

For those who are curious, that ten-years-in-the-making novel was “Palm Tree Pipe Dreams.” It is a dystopian comedy about what happens in Southern California when traffic finally reaches critical mass and comes to a complete halt. I was never able to find a publisher for it, so I self-published. Click here to find it on Amazon. Even though it didn’t result in commercial success, I love this story and am glad I finished it. I needed the closure. I’m currently adapting it into a screenplay. (Movie production companies: get in touch!)